At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
