Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
