i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
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