and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
do herpes really smell.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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