Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize
