Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
