you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Randomize
