you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
did i walk over a car last night?
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
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