thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
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