can u get pink eye on your cock?
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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