I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Randomize