My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Randomize