Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
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