Will you blow on my dice?
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
