turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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