Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Randomize