Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Randomize
