I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
