I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Randomize
