i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
