super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Randomize
