This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
