It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Randomize
