so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
