Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
