Christians are straight up FREAKS
Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
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