Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize