so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Randomize