it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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