I don't remember. Are we still dating?
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
be right there i have to get my cape
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Randomize
