Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Randomize
