i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
Randomize
