What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize
