if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
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