if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Randomize
