Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
Randomize
