he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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