i jhust puked up my retainher.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
What drink are we having for lunch?
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Randomize
