Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Randomize