I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
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