weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
my phone needs a breathalizer
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
Randomize
