my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
