he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
Randomize
