A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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