Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Randomize
