im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
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