HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
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