Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
