you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
