Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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