Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Randomize
