it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
