i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
Randomize
